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Thursday, August 13, 2009

Compassion and Wisdom

This article is beautiful, and describes eloquently what true wisdom and compassion are, and how to get there beginning with yourself. It's something I'm always talking about, and I feel this article completely in alignment with what I'm always sharing. It starts with one's self, and from there you have the choice to go beyond what you think you see in the mirror. I hope you enjoy this article, it is a bit long but SO worth the read. Put your extra 5 minutes into yourself today and take some time with a good read, even if it's not this one.

Bless your heart with love,
Eve



Compassion and Wisdom



"The human heart is basically very compassionate, but without wisdom, compassion will not work. Wisdom is the openness that lets us see what is essential and most effective."


As human beings, we all try our best to bring about a world based on kindness and compassion. What seems to go wrong, however, is that what I want, what I personally would like, becomes more important than the benefit of the whole community.

Whether we look at religion, philosophy, science, development or politics, wherever there has been human society it has manifested wisdom and compassion. But because of our tendency to be involved with our own selfishness, our own likes and dislikes, we develop walls and isolate ourselves from others.

We do not allow the openness that can be felt between human beings to express itself because of two fundamental things: hope and fear. All of us want some happiness and no one wants to suffer, so every action we take is motivated by the thought of how can I be happy, how can I avoid pain. In a world already divided in so many ways, we create a world of our own. A very selfish attitude develops.

All philosophies and religions in the world aim to break through this wall of self-isolation, so that we can work with one another with real care and compassion. From a Buddhist point of view, we examine ourselves carefully—not as a way of blaming ourselves for having created this division, but as a way of working with the root cause of the problem.

The problem is not with the world, or with other people, but with ourselves. Wisdom is innate in us; it is not something that can be bought, heard or received from outside. But our involvement with the external environment and the distraction of our own emotions causes a kind of layering or veiling that prevents us from observing ourselves carefully. We do not give ourselves enough time and space to use our innate wisdom to observe ourselves before we act.

However, through meditation, to use an Eastern term, or examination or analysis, to use more Western terms, there exists the possibility for wisdom to arise within every human being. Meditation is the process of looking inward, of refraining from our dualistic tendency to pay more attention to external issues than to the internal issues we don’t want to work on.

A society based upon peace, harmony, wisdom and compassion is not going to come about unless each person begins with themselves. Through our ignorance, our failure to use our innate wisdom, we make many excuses for not starting with ourselves. The biggest excuse we use is that we require the other person to change before we do. So if I get up in the morning and things don’t happen the way that I want, everything gets blamed on my external world. On days when everything goes right, people look good to us and appear kinder.

If we reflect on it, we realize that our perception of the external world has much to do with our internal attitude. Our mind makes excuses based on external circumstances that reflect what we feel inside. When we see a person and he does something we like, then he is a good person. But if this same person does something we don’t like, then he is a bad person. So transforming the external environment must begin with transforming the inner self, because only when the self is tamed and a fair amount of awareness exists within us will we have the strength to relate properly with others.

The human heart is basically very good, very generous, and very compassionate. But it may not always work together with wisdom. The result is that we have many people ready to go out and change the world for the better, but who still view philosophy, religion, and politics according to what they like, according to what they want.

Even in matters of spirituality—where we struggle to attain some selflessness and to let go of attachment, ignorance and selfishness—even there we assert that what we think is wisdom is correct. We assert that what we think is compassion is the correct compassion. Even at the very peak of meditation, we may still have these same opinions, but we use the excuse that it’s for the benefit of all sentient beings. The endless struggle with the self creates this same problem over and over again.

Realizing the innate wisdom in every human being must begin with training the self. To break through ignorance requires breaking through ignorance in all of its forms.

Ignorance is not something that comes from others. Ignorance is something that comes from the projection of the self. In Buddhist philosophy, we speak a lot about illusion, which refers to how human ignorance, or the human mind, creates a lot of external phenomena, and how once that illusion is created, we see it as very solid and permanent.

In meditation, we break through that illusion of external phenomena by analyzing its dream-like nature. The first step is to understand how we create our own illusion—to see how this human mind works to create and solidify the world. If then we can let go of our attachment to that illusion, we will be free from pain, free from our own expectations, and free from our own hope and fear.

Until that level of awareness is achieved, however, every moment of your life, everything you use or consume, comes about from dependence on others. You sit on chairs which were made by other people. You wear clothes which were made by other people. You eat food cooked by other people, which in turn was grown by other people. As much as you would like to believe that you are your own person and have achieved things through your own efforts, the truth is that you are linked with all other beings.

This awareness of our interdependence leads directly to a sense of responsibility, and letting go of our self-grasping. Until we have achieved true selflessness, completely free from ignorance, we can begin in a smaller way by giving back to others what we have received in order to benefit others the best way we can.

Whether we call it compassion, love, caring or a Buddhist term such as bodhicitta, it means the same thing: that in your actions, speech and thought you put others before yourself. Some of us practice meditation to achieve this understanding; others are able to understand this without formal meditation. But no matter how good compassion sounds when you talk about it, it really comes down to practicing it. And no one understands you as well as you do. You need the wisdom to look inward to see what kind of a person you are.

Compassion means letting go of your self-identity, letting go of proving that identity all the time. Compassion means you work in the way the wind works, the sun works, or the air works. Take, for example, how the air assumes the shape of the room. The air does not say, “I will give you this breathing space provided you breathe the way I want.” Everyone enjoys the benefit of being able to breathe in the air. It is the same way with the sun: the sun does not stop shining when there are clouds in the sky.

In that same way, selflessness free from attachment, or compassion used with wisdom, means that one goes beyond the way you want to do things. If you can let go of making yourself the most important person in the world, there will be more capacity and spaciousness within you to work with others. You will find more space, time and energy within yourself.

For example, because of your good heart and kindness, you go to work in a hospital or a hospice. But you find that there are restrictions and you can’t do things the way you want to. You find yourself fighting against the system, and you reach the point where you are exhausted by your efforts. You conclude that your compassion is not being used in the best way.

What needs to be understood at this point, by applying wisdom to your compassion, is how much solidity you are bringing to the situation. Because you are holding on to how you think things should be, your feelings of frustration have overshadowed the creativity you might apply to the situation.

When we want to generate compassion, we ultimately end up working with our own emotions. We discover that any situation which overwhelms us does so to the degree that we solidify it. So without wisdom, compassion will not work. Wisdom is what enables us to be unconditioned and unbiased in our actions. With wisdom, we are not limited to a single cause or purpose; we do our best in a given situation, and then we move on.

Without wisdom, we too often become focused on one single problem or issue, which we think is the most important thing. But we live in a world that is populated by human beings, and as long as there are billions of human beings at work, there will not be a single thing that everyone accepts. There will be many things that are not done or said exactly the way that you like. If you look at different philosophies—whether Christianity, Buddhism, Islam or Hinduism—all of them arise from compassion. But I believe this one is correct, you believe that one is correct, someone else believes another is correct. Even with such a universal concept such as compassion, Buddhists feel it necessary to call it bodhicitta, Hindus feel it necessary to call it karuna, Christians feel it necessary to call it love. We stick to our own terms.

Wisdom teaches us that these differences should not cause us to pull back. They should not stop us from exercising our compassion with even greater strength and motivation. When the Buddha first gave teachings, how many people understood them? None. Because of that, he refused to give the teachings for a period of seven weeks, but then he began to teach again.

If the Buddha had refused to teach because no one listened to him, we would not have the Buddhist religion today. Similarly, if I insist that my words and my compassion have to be accepted by everyone, that really would be decadent wisdom. That would be wisdom for me and no one else. But real wisdom is letting go of the fixation on what I think is right, in order to see more clearly what is really helpful. Wisdom is the openness that lets us see what is essential and most effective, what truly needs to be practiced by all humanity. This is very necessary. This is something that we need to practice.

Wisdom requires that we work with the inner self, in order to act in accordance with the basic goodness we all have. And when we meet with obstacles or difficulties, we can use them to develop more inspiration, for if we sincerely value kindness and caring, that belief will give us the courage to overcome all obstacles. Wisdom is being able to use obstacles in this way. Otherwise, wisdom becomes some sort of museum piece, and we end up collecting philosophies, logics and teachings just like people who collect old furniture.

The wisdom of all the world’s traditions needs to be nurtured and cared for, not collected. Our innate wisdom needs to be developed, understood and sharpened. Each person must develop the quality of fearlessness so that wisdom can cut through their ignorance. The best wisdom is that which you have the courage to apply to yourself. Only then can you really understand human beings as they are. Then you can give yourself and others the chance to grow individually, to think as they want. All of us need space to develop.

We can all learn together to some degree, but the transformation of the world must begin within ourselves. Compassion and wisdom need to function together, combined with skillfulness, tolerance and patience. If we give ourselves the time and space to really observe our own thoughts and actions, good can come about. We give ourselves and others a lot of space in which to function properly; rather than act selfishly, we act selflessly.

Much of this is easy to say. Practice definitely begins with ourselves. When we look into a mirror, we usually know what we want to see, and so we see only what we want. To see what is really in the mirror, good or bad, and to work with what we see, is very important and very necessary. It takes some courage.

So think carefully, because times change. Every moment of life, we lose someone that we know. Time does not wait for anyone, and because there is change in every moment, frivolousness harms only ourselves. But if, in our short lives as human beings, we are able to be of some benefit to someone else, then that is the activity of an enlightened being.


The Ven. Khandro Rinpoche is one of the most prominent women teachers in Tibetan Buddhism. She is a holder of the Kagyü and Nyingma lineages of vajrayana Buddhism; her root teachers are the late Sixteenth Karmapa, the late Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche, and her father, Mindrolling Tichen Rinpoche. Fluent in English, Khandro Rinpoche teaches regularly in North America and Europe.


Compassion and Wisdom, Venerable Khandro Rinpoche, Shambhala Sun, July 2000.

Monday, July 6, 2009

The Search For Truth: Online vs. Reality

The Search For Truth: Online vs. Reality
Copyright 2009 Eve Care

This topic has been hashed over and over for more than a decade now, and it still comes down to this: You must always discern for yourself what is the truth and what is not, when it comes to dealing on the internet, as well as real life.

Some people have said that it is impossible to make real friends over the internet, and that is because so many people are untrue, phony and not who they project their image to be as their authentic actual self online as in real life. They do not match, in other words. The online image is a farce; the reality of the person is who they really are.

I agree to this, to some extent, because I have met my share of "phonies" and real friends. There are definite signs to be aware of when making friends on the internet. First and most importantly, always trust your gut feelings. If something doesn't feel right, then it most likely is not. Many times though, it is beneficial to you and another to give the benefit of the doubt and allow people the opportunity to clarify things before you just make assumptions about them. And other times, you just "know" who is a good person, even if you do wind up parting ways at some point because your paths take you in different directions. Some of these connections, however, are lasting ones throughout our whole lives, and this is the core of what the search is for on the internet: that core self-authenticity, embraced and received by another. At least, this was/is my goal.

Here are some perspectives of why people go online to make "real" friends to begin with:

1-The Person Is Changing: Whoever the person is matters not. But who they are, from their core belief system to the values and traditions they held and shared growing up - are beginning to awaken from the limitations of their own beliefs and are now desiring to learn more about the world around them, and most likely, alot of the unknown. They have let go of older beliefs and are now focused on a new set of teachings that ring more true for them than the old belief systems did. This person is seeking others who can relate to them and in the same respect, who they feel they can relate to also.

2-Unaccepted By Their Immediate Family: The person's family is either of an orthodox religion, or no religion, or their faith may be a spiritual path, but totally different from the way this person believes or feels about it. And, if they were to truly express themselves from their own viewpoints and they way they really felt about things, they would risk being judged and ridiculed, outcast, and worst case scenario even possibly disowned. So there is alot of fear surrounding their feeling of being "different," so they turn to the internet looking for ways to enhance their spiritual growth; seeking others to learn and grow with, sharing different schools of thought, teachings and wisdom.

3-Seeking Sanctuary: Alot of times someone suffers from abuse and is afraid to tell anyone about it. The anonymity of the internet grants them the freedom to discuss such issues where they don't have to feel afraid, and they can receive the help and support they need. This too applies to addictions. (It is true, when I quit smoking, I turned to an online support group because there were none to be found in the actual geographical area where I lived, and plus, I preferred to set my own pace and not adhere to a schedule of meetings - it was more flexible for me to arrange my time better as well.) There are many support groups online now who can help with whatever burden you are carrying, no matter where you live, and if there is no access to one in their local area.

4-Coming Out: Some people don't feel that their sexual preferences would be accepted by others right away, or are seeking ways to tell their family and friends; another form of support in coming out of that fear of being rejected, ridiculed and outcast once again. They seek to confide in others online first, who ARE accepting of this. There are many of those in this widespread community where their sexual preferences (LGBT) have been ridiculed, rejected, judged and actually abused and harmed when they have expressed themselves in real life. Some have even been killed. There is fear surrounding some who wish to come forward but they need to take the steps safely to do so. This is one safe way to get support and be accepted for who you are.

5-Geographic Location: Someone who is within a particular area of the world, surrounded by a particular group of people who share a common mind-set, and this lone person differs from this common mind-set. But no matter what the person does within this area, they will always run into someone else within the same common mind-set, and never be able to open up to those people. So someone who feels like an outsider in their very own community turns to the internet for someone who believes similarly to the way this person does, who differs from the common mind-set. However, if these two people meeting on the internet were to go out their to the local coffee shop, it is likely they would never meet, simply because neither would open up to the other, both thinking the other is within the "common mind-set."

The main theme here is that the internet has allowed people to break through societal restrictions of their family, community and local mind-set. No wonder why so many people have turned to it for this reason - look at where we were before the internet came along and you can start to see the progress the world has made since it came along. New friendships are forged and relationships made, some lasting just a short while and others lasting long-term and lifetime.


But the list goes on.

I have found that in my own experience, my spiritual growth was not something I could share with my immediate family, for they just did not understand when I tried to explain my views about God, religion, spirituality, faith and other realms or dimensions of the universe, etc. So I turned to spiritual groups online, in a forum-type of setting, to openly discuss such things. I felt safe going to a place where I was embraced for who I really Am, in my changes and transformation to a much more spiritual being than I had been, and was confident in expressing my own views there. (The discussions were not always harmonious as everyone is still an individual with their own beliefs and ideas about things, but, I learned alot and was able to grow together with others at the same time and it was a wonderful experience to get to know some of these people online.) The majority of my online schooling in spiritual growth has been an overall amazing experience, where I did get to meet some of the people I had known for a couple of years online and forged real friendships this way. I was able to travel and meet others of like-mind and heart, and to date, I have some lifetime friendships as a result of these choices.

I believe internet-friending has truly OPENED everything up to where someone, who, if decided upon an authentic expression of themselves, accepting themselves first for who they are, will ultimately meet others of the authentic kind if that is what they desire.

It is wise to know that like attracts like, and you get what you give. If one gives truth one finds and receives truth back. If one gives lies and deceit then that is what they get in return. We reap what we sow. Period.

If one is not in the space of allowing others to be who they are, then one finds themselves not at peace with themselves, therefore cannot consider that others have a right to be who they are and not be judged for it. This is the reason WHY people have gone online to search for others of like-mind and heart; it is simply because there are SO many people out there who are QUICK to judge and criticize others for who they are - and that is for one reason and one reason ONLY: The one who is judging others is also in judgment of themselves. They do not like what they see in the mirror, so they need to judge others in order to keep in balance with their own disharmonic energy of unacceptance of self. In other words, they do not truly love themselves.

Once a person can get past the "surface" and go deeply within their being and finding their true connection to their heart again, then they may begin to love themselves truly and the judgment energy will simply fall away - for in love, there is not judgment, nor question.

Still one has to be careful and yes, discernment online is a MUST. But to do this, one must trust themselves enough to know what feels good and healthy and what feels otherwise. And when one goes looking for trouble, well...enough said.

Be authentic, be yourself, love yourself, accept yourself, allow yourself to be who you are, and you will find the world is your best friend. Well, at least the ones in the world who are also living in the authentic expression of their true heart's space.

Be blessed.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Fannagling Images



YEAH! I DID IT!

I will write a brief tutorial on how to accomplish the image add with no link OR border!

I swear I searched everywhere for the answer to this today and couldn't find it...could be I was the only one having this issue.

Well, fixed and finito!

Nite y'all xx

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

The Daily Journey - 2

OK. Got some stuff done - 3 new blogs created between yesterday and today (which you can also find at the bottom of the blog titled "In Other News...er...Blogs!").

Here they are:

1 - E♥C Game Reviews

The other 2 have been deleted - I'm getting serious now with what I really want to do, and not just putting my ideas down and not following through. I truly have way too many ideas to put into action, it's overwhelming at times. So I've deciphered what I really want to do with these blogs.

I also need to figure out how in the heck to get the link off the images I put in the blogs here.

Let's give it a shot right now:




Hugs,
Eve

Monday, November 10, 2008

The Daily Journey - 1

Ok, I'm here - now what?

Well, first off, I want to note that I Am on a brand new journey here with Blogger and have no idea how to really use it yet - other than make a blog post and fannagle a new template with some colors.

I have to admit moving away from 360 is a challenge since I really used to enjoy the aspects of changing your theme around, but who knows? Blogger templates are written in HTML, the one language I Am good at writing in, so maybe I'll make one of my own and share it with the community? Who knows...But I do know that I can do this and even though I don't see any features yet to change the theme around the way you would like, as far as background images and photos go, that doesn't mean there won't be any in the future...so blogger peeps if you are reading this...maybe you can make a note of that? (I think if they made blogger to work with elements that 360 had, well you'd wind up with a total win/win IMHO.)

Ok, well, I'm off to get my day going. I'm going to stay with this theme for awhile until I Am settled on what I want to do with this blog. I intent to just allow my self to write whatever I Am feeling to share at the moment, and I don't know how much I will be here, but when I have the urge to write or Am drawn to be here I will be!

Have a blessed day with lots of love,
Eve